Thoughts and Reflections from a Hospital Room

“Oh The Places You’ll Go !“- Dr Suess

Had a terrible night last night in the hospital….

First, let just establish that you won’t get a lot of sleep in a hospital without a lot of preparation …which on my part will basically be me telling the night shift to please don’t bother me, unless I call for you…just let me sleep!

Problem solved ( hopefully )…this lack of sleep last night ( due in part to having to constantly get up and urinate ) and being disturbed during my sleep by what the nurses have to do ( well, namely their jobs ) plus the trauma that I went thru to have a Kidney Biopsy ( let me throw you a hint here…when you have acid reflux, it’s not a good thing to have this person not eat anything for several hrs…in my case nine hours, because the reaction can be just terrible ) and after that nice experience, two days later having a pic line installed in your arm for the convenience of easy access to your blood and for pumping antibiotics into you, and said installation not going as well as it should have, well between the lack of sleep and two rather tiring procedures, I was ready to call it a day here, and just go back home early!

Anyway, I came to realize after this second hospital stint, just what is and who is important to me in my life, and to stay humble and reflective about it all…it was time to look at all the good in my life at this point and so….

My Job at Belmay

This has become a no-brainer for me since my becoming ill. First, I have to admit that when I first came to Belmay and started in their maintenance dept.. I was thrilled to just have a job again after being out of work for a month between the month of November (Thanksgiving was a real effort that year )and the beginning of December of 93.

Over the past few years, I had seen a lot of changes come to Belmay, some which I thought were good changes, and some which I did not think were favorable to employees. At this point, there were also changes to the factory and the way compounding was being done.

I caught a fantastic break almost two years ago now, a promotion into the Purchasing Dept.

I also work work with two fantastic people…

My Boss, Bob Daly, is just the easiest person to work for and has been very understanding concerning my illness and recent hospitalization. When I lost my mother last year, Bob came to the funeral services, and was very supportive of me with anything I needed concerning taking time to grieve the loss of my mother.

My Friend and co-worker Lissette, has also been supportive, and understanding during the loss of my mother, and my subsequent hospitalization, and is just a joy to be around, and of course, she just loves to tease me whenever she can ( which can be quite often, but I really don’t mind it one bit ) Lissette is a dear friend, and I don’t tell that her often enough.

My Nuclear Family

My wife Susan, has had to deal with so much since I have gotten sick, having to take over and do things that I am usually responsible for taking care of, plus coming up to the hospital to be with me, plus now having to go back to work, and still deal with taking care of the house, while I am still here in the hospital recouperating.

My Daughter Samantha, is the apple of my eye. She is 25 years old, and is probably one of the only things I have done right in my life ( other than marrying Sue of course! ), and of course even at 25 years of age, I am still the doting father ( sometimes, too doting for both of our own good…and I will work on that! )

Samantha is just a great child…she knows her own mind, is very opinionated and independant, and she has a great eye for photography.

As a parent, I couldn’t be prouder.

My Extended Family in Brooklyn and Staten Island

In brooklyn, my cousin Randy and Bobby Carapolo

Randy and I have always been close. We lived close by on the same block in Canarsie some time ago ( better than 30 years ago to be honest ), and while I do not venture down to brooklyn very often anymore, we have remained very close.

Randy and I had to deal with my mother’s hospitalization when she was in brooklyn, Randy actually taking the lead in taking care of my mother’s needs during the week while I came down on weekends and stayed with my aunt Dotty ( who I will speak of later ) and went to the hospital to see to my mother’s needs. I should mention that my cousin Randy and Bobby share a house with my aunt.

While there was a moment of disagreement concerning the moving of my mother out of the the hospital to a rehab unit closer to home ( the disagreement was actually over taking the advice of a person who I had no intention of consulting with nor listening to as far as this was aspect was concerned ) Randy was with me thru it all, and I love her all the more for what we shared together.

Randys husband Bobby is a real cutup, and I’ve known him since I was a little child. There is a little story that happened when I was a little kid and Randy was baby sitting for me….I’m sure I do not have to repeat the story here..right Ran?

My Aunt Dotty

The last of three sisters, my Aunt Dotty and my mother were very close and enjoyed a great releationship together. They were very close and it the loss of my mother was very hard and tough on her. I think my aunt and I have a great releationship and I love her dearly, and she means all the world to me.

My Staten Island Family

Steve & Beth Garfinkle

I’ve known Steve forever. He has a crazy sense of humor, and is always able to bring a smile to my face ( which truth to tell, is a pretty tall task ) and I think we kinda have a little competetion as afr as always having the latest new ” tech ” but I think he is ahead right now.

Beth does a lot of Ebay stuff, so she is always going to some sort of Estate Sale to get new items to sell. I believe that she and Randy both do well ( better than I have anyway ) selling their wares on Ebay.

Steve and Beth have a beautiful home on Staten Island. I do not visit them often enough, but after what I have been dealing with, I will try to recify that situation in the future.

My Support Group

This is my special group of people, who while not part of my immediate family, have been there for me thru all the adversity that has been my life for the past eight years now, and so they are a part of my extended family, and are all very important to me in my life…

David & Victor Colon

Here are two young people, who I have known since they were little kids ( nothing like dating one’s self is there! ), and had the pleasure to watch grow into two, productive, young adults. Vic is into Weight lifting ( as I have been in earliar years ), and David is another guy who has played Magic with us on and off thru the years. Oh and Dave is just a bit crazy…like another Marrow Bone Dave?

Chris Cole

Chris is another person, who I have had the pleasure to see grow and become a decent young man. Chris, is always there for me when it comes to needing to do anything…either helping me get a new gas grill, doing work in my home, or just aggrravating the hell out of me when we play cards together ( I’ve never seen someone with his kind of luck! ), he has been and continues to be a great and loyal friend.

Paul Lavan

Paul is a dear & special friend.

We both worked together at Belmay for about 12 years together, untill he took a civil service job and left Belmay to move onto greener pastures.

Paul and I were work out partners at Golds Gym in Middletown, until I had decided to leave the gym.

Paul has a great family…His wife Paula is just a great person, and I don’t tell her that often enough.

Paula and Paul have two boys, Donald and Michael, who I have the pleasure to still see sometimes when they are home on a visit.

Paula and Paul are also grandparents by Donald…I am joyful and happy for them, all at the same time.

I think I am about due to cook ( and burn some food for them ) at a family event in the near future . Fourth of July is coming up! And Paul and I are due to share another breakfast together soon…I will make it happen!

Victor Borgos

Victor and I have worked together at Belmay for several years now, and I have nothing but the highest respect for Vic.

Vic is a pretty soft spoken, intelligent guy, who has always been part of my support group in one way or another.

From when I was doing ” Futurezone Video Games ” to when I was working on plans for a downloadable gaming system ( still attached to Futurezone ), Vic was one of only two people ( the other being my best friend Ken ) who I spoke with in confidence, and sought out advice and counsul from as far as Futurezone was concerned.

Vic is another person who I have come to realize, I do not acknowledge often enough…I will rectifiy this situation also.

Lorrie Chiapetta

Lorrie became part of my support group more thru sharing tragedy together…let me explain further…

When I lost my mother this past August, Lorrie and I just starting to share emails back and forth with one another, talking about how we had been dealing with the losses of my Mother and Lorrie’s Dad.

Our emails were so genuine, and full of raw emotions, we just seemed to gravitate toward one another as two people that shared honest feelings about grief and the pain of couping with our respective losses.

What started out as a few emails between two people dealing with grief and loss, has blossomed into a close friendship between the two of us, and quite frankly, I am the better for it and have come to realize how lucky I am to have her as my friend and confidant.

Lorrie has become my ” Big Sister ” and has shown me nothing but compassion and genuine concern during my hospitalization, calling me here in the hospital, sending me emails, and just being an all around great person and friend.

Lorrie constantly is a comfort to myself and my family, and she has become very close to my heart.

Thanks for everything Sis!

Okay, there is only one other person in this group left for me to talk about….

Kenneth Beecher III

I’m not quite sure where to begin here as far as Ken goes, because quite frankly, Ken isn’t just a friend…while not in blood…Ken truly is my brother.

I met Ken better than seven years ago now at Belmay, and it wasn’t long before we just found we shared a lot of the same values and attitudes about work, and how we
approached life in general. Naturally, we gravitated toward one another and became close friends rather quickly.

We had formed a business together, and started it on Ebay, we made a real go of it, but it just did not work out the way we had thought it would ( Ebay is tough, and what we were doing in the end was not really unique to Ebay ) and so we dissolved the partnership, after having contributed a lot of money together, and just not seeing the right ROI ( return on investment ), but our friendship did not diminish because of this.

In 2001, when my dad first became ill, and for what would become several different episodes requiring his being hospitalized, Ken was there for me thru it all.

When my dad passed away in 2005, the first person I called was Ken, even before I called my wife and daughter. Trying to remember that evening, I don’t think it was 15 minutes before Ken was at the hospital with us, comforting my mother, and coming back to my house and staying with her, talking to her and just staying with her.

Ken was with us at both the viewing of my dad, and the burial at the Veteran’s cemetary in Goshen, NY. He was with my family in the limosine, it was what I had wanted, and Ken was just there, no questions asked. He had actually taken the day off from work to be there for my family and myself.

Again, my brother was there for me when I lost my mother this past August, as a matter of fact he was there for me thru out her whole ordeal, being hospitalized in Brooklyn, my having to travel back and forth to oversee her care in brooklyn, and her subsequent passing.

The one thing that stays with me the most, was when I had the viewing at the funural home for mom. When Ken and his girlfriend Candice arrived, Ken game me a hug, that just pretty much engulfed my whole being, and for a moment, I thought that I would be able to survive this also….just his hug made that difference for me….how do you return that type of caring, concern, and genuine love?

I try everyday to honor the special bond we share together, and not take the special gift of my brother’s friendship for granted ever.

Ken’s support, caring and understanding was and continues today, to be a godsend for myself and my family.

I have actually become a better person, I think anyway, because of Ken, and there is nothing I could ever do to possibly repay my brother’s kindness, patience, and understanding.

My Future Plans

Well, obviously the first part of the plan is to get home again…that looks like mid week ( can you say Comic Book Wednesday! ) and after I get home, there are going to be a lot of lifestyle changes, starting with becoming less of a work a holic, enjoying time with my family and friends a lot more, and finding ways to eliminate more stress.

I plan on listening to Joel Osteen’s new book, ” Become a Better You “, which I have on cd.

Replacing some of my drums on my kit, replacing my cymbals with a complete new ” Neil Peart ” Sabian Paragon case set.

Replacing my fish tank ( a 55 gallon ) with a 70 gallon Bow, complete with the proper equipment and stand to accommadte the tank…

And of course, Susan’s and my long, long overdue honeymoon ( 26 years overdue to be exact ) to Hawaii at the end of August, beginning of September, and I look forward to this the most of all…we are finalizing last minute details, such as what activities we are definetly looking to do on this vacation…but we won’t be doing something everyday…the idea of this vacation is just pure relaxation for the both of us.

Okay, I’m finally finished with this post…and it only took me three days to complete!

Lew, your fanboy@50…on the mend again and looking to be home again very soon!